Posted without credit in the Zing Section of the Tallahassee Democrat: See if I got this right: Regular fee to drive a 5,000-pound four-wheel-drive with no training, but if I ride a 300-pound motorcycle, I have to take a four-day safety course and pay $300.
To the dude/dudette that wrote this: Dear Mr/Ms Dude/Dudette. Yes you have it right. And yes we know that you were "supposed" to be taught in school that all men are created equal. And we were created equal. It's just that this little thing like government came along and said, "aha, you may have been created equal but we will determine just how equal you are." And see, you bought a motorcycle, which means you are no longer equal. In fact, you are now less than equal. Lets us count just some of the more egregious ways.
1. Not only will you take a safety course at your expense. The course you will be required to take has no peer reviewed studies by an independent scholarly institution indicating that the course can do anything more than teach you to go in circles in a parking lot.
2. A new law requires that both your hands be on the handlebars. No stunt riding for you. Oh yeah, that means you cannot use one hand to keep a cell phone stuck to your ear while putting lipstick on with the other.
3. I guess it is only fair that since you probably paid your share of tax dollars to build toll roads that your motorcycle should pay the same toll as the 5000lb 4 wheel vehicle. Keep in mind however that how your motorcycle rides on these roads will not be taken into consideration when they work on them. The bias will go to the vehicles that cause the worst wear and tear on the infrastructure. Which of course you will continue to be taxed to pay for.
4. You will also pay the same amount to park in most places as your 5000lb cousin even though you will take up much less space.
5. You will like this one best of all. This is the one your Florida legislators fought like hell for and against. This is the one that lets you know just how much your elected officials and apparently the press as they raised no hell about it, care about you. Because you will also learn that you are not equal in the eyes of the press either. This will be evidenced by the fact that if a cement truck squashes your ass and you die of terminal flatness they will end their accident report with whether or not you were wearing a "helmet".
But we digress. on to number 5, Ta Da: It is very likely that should you get caught doing a wheelie on you motorcycle, it is going to cost you way more than it would cost the burrito munching, cell phone yacking soccer mom or deal making lobbyist or some pandering politician
who to turn left in front of you totaling your 300lb bike and possibly your ass. See, they will say they "didn't see him/her". And that will be true, because they have been taught by the media, press, politicians and judges and some of our own, that we do not matter.
So yepper, you got it right. Question? Are you gonna be one of the ones that lays down and takes or are yo gonna be one of the ones that raises hell. Do you think enough of yourself to stop the rest of society from disrespecting you?Add to Technorati Favorites
"Also on Tuesday, Tallahassee police stood by their earlier statements that Hoffman didn't follow protocol during the undercover operation that led to her death. An attorney for the Hoffman family, Lance Block, sent a letter Monday to city officials putting them on notice that a wrongful-death lawsuit could be filed."
Where is the drug Court in all of this???? Ms. Hoffman was involved in "treatment". The police should know that as such she is hands off. Legalities aside their is a significant ethical question here that is not being addressed? Why not? Is it common practice to use persons in treatment
as expendable???? The question needs to be asked? Are the people waging the war on drugs m more dangerous to society than the drugs themselves.
"Block has criticized the Tallahassee Police Department's recruiting of Hoffman and its handling of the undercover operation. The plan veered off course when Hoffman followed the two men to Gardner Road, about two miles from the designated meeting place at Forestmeadows Park.
"The establioffman, although she told them by cell phone where she was headed.shed plan had the meeting occurring somewhere else, a place where we had established as an area of surveillance, and that's where the protocol comes into play," police spokesman David McCranie said.
McCranie would not comment Tuesday on how long it took officers to get to Gardner Road, which was a question Block raised in his letter. Block said police failed to immediately follow H
"In my opinion, the most important aspect to this case is why the Tallahassee Police Department didn't get to Gardner Road before all the violence," Block said.
TPD's arrival time at Gardner Road was not included in the arrest report for Bradshaw and Green, and McCranie said Tuesday that the arrival time is part of an internal investigation.
Also at issue in the investigation is the ending of the final contact Hoffman made with police. Investigators said in initial court documents that Hoffman ended her phone call with officers. On Tuesday, McCranie said police only knew that the call ended. A listening device in her purse also stopped working." Read the whole story here and ask yourself, what if this was your daughter. I seem to remember a Florida Governors daughter involved in drugs passing bad script. Was she recruited by police?Add to Technorati Favorites
The lifestyle of the the “born to wild” non conformist “Biker” has reached new heights with the soon to be aired FX TV series “Sons of Anarchy.”
From the “OFFICIAL,” note that word “official” “Sons of Anarchy website”
Ok, so you probably can't read that. O.k., so I probably don't care, O.K.. It is to me just another example of how business will capitalize on the caricature of ourselves that we have come to be. Oh yes I know that there will probably be thousands tuning in to see how a real biker (or some sanitized, idealized t.v. version of an angst driven outlaw who really wants do good yada, yada, yada) lives and a plethora of these persons will run right out, form there own “outlaw motorcycle clubs” and promptly get themselves killed.
Which is it? Life imitates art or art imitates life? Don't ask me, my life's an illusion!
The king of Branding however has to be Harley Davidson. That probably needs no further explanation.
From Harely panties and boots, to bed covers and table lamps at prices that would make Tiffany's jealous all sold under the mantra “Screw it lets ride”.
Years ago I had a 69 stretch trumpet with an Iron cross tailight. Recently I ran across two Iron cross taillights that I would like to run on the back of my bagger. Question? Does that mean I would become an adherent of the cult of Jesse James? Maybe if I added some expensive gold leaf to the scratches in the tank I could morph into a Jesse James/OCC cross breed on which to ride to my favorite cultural event. Cause Lord know you can't ride them bikes in the mountains.
I do take pride in a certain rebelliousness by maintaining my factory pipes that are finally rusting into a pretty decent sound.
I have recently purchased a light weight vest with pockets, yes pockets. Places I can stuff all the stuff I want to get to without having to spend Lord knows how long getting my bag latches to stay shut. But have found that I can lose stuff as easy with pockets as I can without. I did this after seeing the pre-patched vests for sale. I have yet to go up to one of these obvious off the shelf jobs and ask the owner, “could you tell me how to get to route 66” so as not to cause embarrassment. So you get my drift?
Of late circumstances and events elicit in me a strange and perverse desire (o.k. I take that back, I was born with strange and perverse desires. I treasure them deeply) to just throw caution to the wind (or whatever else will go into the wind without blowing back in your face) and say to a certain few, are you freaking whacked?
Heres the gig re: branding and the intolerance and hypocrisy in the motorcycle arena over brands and their meaning.
Lets take Hooters for example. Well hell take a pair. They have plenty. I am convinced that they have a factory hidden away in the midwest somewhere where they stamp out Hooters girls. They do a run of blondes, then some brunettes, a few African Americans that all look alike in their pretty little orange and white clingy outfits, except for Bike Nights. Hooters has moved big time into bike nights though I have no idea why. I can only guess that they have become sincerely concerned about government intrusion on individual rights and the numbers of us that are being killed on the highway. This is evidenced by the cute little black outfits the waitresses wear on Bike nights to mourn those lost on the highways. And oh yeah damn, I almost forgot , the money.
But hey, whose to complain. They have taken a national pastime, girl watching, sanitized and legitimized it and profited. It's the American way and we got no problem with it (well other than we might like to see them at the capital on occasion helping to fight for our rights, but hey why sweat the little stuff). I just want them to bring back the coconut shrimp.
Now take a local business that also caters to “Bikers” say OUTZ's TOO for example whose brand is that across the state it is known, that if you are biker traveling down hwy 98, you just have to stop at OUTZ's. Thats a premium brand. Then take for instance K&K fish camp, another local biker mecca whose brand is quickly becoming, “who knows what they will come up with next and when is the next vibrator race”. Well thats a brand. Thats good clean biker fun. I know. Last race I personally checked each and every vibrator and found them to be clean (well that may be a stretch, the fact that I checked them all I mean).
Now recently I received a little e-mail in my e-mail box which is where most of my e-mail goes though only God an Bill Gates knows why. This little missive objected to certain references we had made regarding the vibrator races. After all VIBRATORS? OUT IN THE OPEN? RACING? Call the culture police PLEASE!
Now lets get this straight o.k. We consider it our patriotic duty to cover all things biker lifestyle related.
And if that means we have to force ourselves to witness some Americas finest ladies cheer for their favorite vibrator well then by God, Chevrolet and apple pie we will do it.
These nay sayers were afraid to be associated with such all American things as “vibrators”. But then maybe had the races included “Ben Wa Balls” made popular in Japan it would be different. But then we will have to investigate that further.
But what was extremely interesting, or maybe even hypocritical, you be the judge. Was the recent missive they put out with a right fine example of a factory produced Hooters girl draped seductively over the handlebars of one of their bikes.
Well when this was first sent to me, by a lady friend I might mention, I became quite indignant as I am prone to do. Hypocrites I hollered as I jumped up spilling my coffee. Justifying exploitation of women to suit their own needs I shouted as I slammed my fist down in the ashtray sending a lit cigarette God knows where (figure sooner or later I will see the smoke). Just jealous because they didn't think of it first. (ummm, it is here that I should probably mention that I have no problem with men exploiting women or women exploiting men. Call it exploitation if you will. I prefer to call it appreciation of the finer things in life).
But then in a moment of clarity it came to me, this particular line of product is fairly innocuous and doesn't really have a brand. Well they do have a brand name. And at some point in time I will mention it. But not until I have acted upon the devious plan currently jelling in the gelatinous goop my brain cells are supposed to occupy.
So it may be that they have have commenced upon a marketing ploy by which they can proclaim we don't need vibrators to exploit anybody, we have “Hooters Girls”! We are the Hooters brand of motorcycle product! Of course I'm wondering if they have considered that castrative effect this may have on some of the gentleman that utilize their product line.
I also might wonder if alienating a sizable portion of the motorcycling community by silently condemning their activities while at the same time trying to steal the old Honda catch phrase “you meet the nicest people on.......” replacing the 50's teenage image with a Hooters girl might not backfire. After all, Honda trashed that line long ago and started building V twins.
Oh yeah, lest I not be true to my nature I might also ask what they do for bikers rights and/or motorcycle safety other than try and “EXPLOIT” the concept of rider training and increase sales touting support of failed M$F curriculum.
Now see, Mike of Mikes Helmets got it. Isn't it amazing how many in the motorcycle industry don't?Add to Technorati Favorites