We had to go on a search for real "Auto Erotica". You know, "Auto" for auto and "Erotica" for Erotica and you get, BINGO, you got it, AUTO-EROTICA.
Now mind you we had to search hard because:
A. We are the shy and innocent type and ain't really sure what them south Florida boys mean when they say, "Auto Erotica."
B. We wanted to be sure that we could frame it in such a manner as to educate the public and if at all possible save the life of a Biker.
Yes it was difficult. But you knew we could do it, didn't ya? So we present to you a Public Service Announcement:
Woman Nabbed For Auto Erotic Crime
Cincinnati driver caught multitasking herself
AUGUST 25--A Cincinnati woman was simultaneously masturbating with a sex toy and watching a pornographic video while driving last week, according to cops who arrested her on assorted criminal charges.Colondra Hamilton, 36, was pulled over last Tuesday evening in a traffic stop triggered when cops noticed she was driving a 2008 Pontiac with overly tinted windows. That’s when officers noticed that Hamilton’s pants were unbuttoned. And she had a vibrator in her lap. Questioned by cops, Hamilton admitted to engaging in auto erotic manipulation, and revealed that she had also been watching a porno movie that was playing on the laptop of a friend in the passenger seat, according to an Elmwood Place Police Department report. Hamilton, pictured in the above mug shot, was booked into the Hamilton County jail on a misdemeanor count of driving with “impaired alertness.” Hamilton was also charged with possession of drug paraphernalia since cops found a “broken piece of crack pipe” in her purse. She was not, however, accused of using the pipe while she was driving and masturbating and watching an X-rated film, the title of which was not released.
Now had she been asphyxiating herself at the same time then that would be referred to as AUTO-AUTO EROTICA. Which of course would have no need of a stick shift and she obviously had one. Or at least the Officer wrote that it was in her lap.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN START YOUR ENGINES!
I guess we know how she broke her crack pipe ya think? Talk about distracted driving.
O.K. Lets get serious. Pass this around to all your friends what ride on motorcycles. Cause just the thought of that following me makes me want to go way fast! aaaaaaaacccccckkkkkkkkkkk..........Add to Technorati Favorites
